Logan



 

Hello dear reader, well they say all good things come to an end and with a few possible exceptions, which I’ll get to later, Logan marks the end of Hugh Jackman playing the Wolverine and also the last time we will also see Sir Patrick Stewart taking on the mantel of Charles Xavier, or ‘Wheels’ as he’s more affectionately referred to by Mr Pointy Knuckles himself. Back in 2000 Bryan Singer directed what was to be the first of many mutant movies and he set the ball rolling on what has become a very successful franchise. Now, it would be almost unthinkable to try and suggest anyone other than Robert Downey Jr to play Iron Man and the same is true for Logan. Wolverine IS Hugh Jackman and Hugh Jackman IS Wolverine. The two are now permanently linked together and it’s futile to try and think of one without the other. In the same way that Jekyll had his Hyde, Sherlock had his Watson and Ant-Man had his Dec-Man. The Wolverine Jackman combo is now truly set in stone as a pop culture icon that isn’t going to be forgotten about anytime soon. So just think, if it hadn’t have been for a substantial overrun and scheduling conflicts on John Woo’s Mission Impossible II, then the last seventeen years could have looked very different. Yes, though it pains me to say it, if Mr Woo had been able to deliver the aforementioned film on time and on not had to deal with the reshoots Paramount had asked for, then Dougray Scott would have been lighting up the multiplexes across the globe as the man with the mutton chops, spandex suit and a one size fits all tin opener.  And, if you don’t know who he is, it’s probably because he wasn’t able to play Wolverine seventeen years ago and has spent most of the last two decades on the periphery of Hollywood A-list, trying very hard to get in…

So back to Logan. It marks the ninth X-Men movie to date, or tenth if you Include Ryan Reynolds Deadpool and apart from Deadpool, Hugh Jackman has been in, popped up or cameoed in (delete where appropriate) every single one of them. To be fair, he was mentioned in Deadpool and, albeit briefly, Ryan Reynolds does walk around in a Wolverine mask for a while but it would seem that the character of Wolverine is inexplicably linked to all things X-Men and you can’t make a movie about mutants without him.  The good news is that Logan is not like anything that has come before it and although its directed by the same man who directed the last standalone Wolverine film, which by the way was cunningly titled ‘The Wolverine’, James Mangold has taken the film in a completely different direction to its predecessors. This was been widely regarded as a good thing as the common consensus re ‘The Wolverine’ is that it sucked so much it could and indeed should have been called ‘The Dyson’. 

Towards the end of 2016, just as the first trailer for Logan was about to be released, James Mangold tweeted a picture of one of the pages from the Logan screenplay and there, within that one photo, it revealed the tone and direction the movie was set to take. That one page of A4 shows Logan dropping the F-bomb and more importantly, hidden within the exposition there was the following little nugget of information “Basically, if you’re on the make for a hyper choreographed, gravity defying, city-block destroying, CG fuckathon, this ain’t your movie.” So not much of a grey area or wiggle room there then. Thanks to Deadpool and its adult R-rated approach, Logan was going to be allowed to pick up where Wade Wilson had stopped, taking the very violent and foul mouthed baton and running with it at full pelt.

So, what about plot I hear you ask. Well, in its simplest form Logan tells the story of a man who’s worn out. A man who has paid his dues and then some and just wants to live the quiet life, under the radar, not bothering anyone and trying very hard to make sure no one bothers him. Set in the year 2029, we find Charles Xavier being looked after Caliban, played very well by the head shaven Stephen Merchant and Logan working as a limo driver to help pay the bills and medical costs to keep Charles deteriorating mental health and brain quakes under control. In this not so distant future we find a world where new mutants are not being born and the ones that are still alive are being hunted to the point of extinction. Now this causes one of my few niggles with the film Logan. The reason for there not being any new mutants being born is very much one of those ‘blink and you’ll miss it’ explanations. It almost seems like a throwaway line the writers have used to paint themselves back out of the corner they so deftly brushed themselves into. As well as dealing with Charles health problems Logan is having to also negotiate with his own failing health. It would seem that the adamantium that was inserted into his body, all those years ago, has been slowly poisoning him and Logan’s ability to heal has been slowly slipping away. Due to Charles having this brain episodes, which effectively paralyse everyone with the immediate vicinity when they happen, they are having to lay low in a Mexican compound, just south of the border. Everything seems to be going well and then a young girl and her nurse/mother gate crash the story and convince Logan to take them to a safe area, just across the Canadian border.

You may have seen this young girl in the trailers for the film. Clips of her kicking man size butt and basically doing whatever she thinks is necessary to survive have been floating around for a while now.  She is pivotal to the story and without giving too much away she is referred to as X-23.  Now, what isn’t in any of the promotional material you’ll find out there is that there is also an X-24. It’s a credit to all those involved with the making of the film that they managed to keep X-24 well and truly under their hats. It can’t have been easy but the fact that it was such a closely guarded secret meant it was a nice unexpected surprise when it was first revealed on screen.

And there you have it. After three X-Men (the last of which was pants), three Standalone and three wibbly wobbly timey wimey films (the last of which was double pants with cardigan elbow patches on top) both Hugh Jackman and Sir Patrick of the Stewart are done. Both have said that this is the end for them but the good news is I suspect it won’t be the last time we ever see either of these characters on the silver screen. Xavier already has a younger understudy in the form of James McAvoy waiting in the wings and I’m sure they’ll find some way to incorporate him in future X-Men films and lets all be honest here, there will be future X-Men films! Recasting the Wolverine may prove to be a much tougher proposition altogether though. I mean where do you even start?  If it were down to me I’d be calling the respective agents of Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Kit Harington or if you’re a fan of long shots, possibly even Gwendoline Christie. Whoever the powers that be chose to replace ‘The Wonder from Down Under’ they will have some awfully large shoes to fill and the task of effectively reinventing the wheel and whoever gets the winning ticket they’ll also need some fairly strong shoulders to deal with the weight of expectation thrust upon them. In closing I’ll say this. It can’t be a coincidence that the bulk of this story is about people wanting to cross borders to give themselves a chance at a better and safer life. It can also not be a coincidence that the main antagonist in Logan is called Donald. But fear not ladies and gentleman, if Logan tells us anything it’s that the future is bright and it’s almost certainly not orange… 

 

Twitter Review:
Logan is the send-off Wolverine needs & deserves. Violent & vicious with just a twist of compassion.
#X-23IsTheMagicNumber

 

Useful Links:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3315342/?ref_=nv_sr_1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DekuSxJgpbY
http://www.empireonline.com/movies/logan/review/

Trainspotting 2



 

Hello dear reader, 1996 was an odd year. Nintendo released the N64, the Spice Girls had their first number one, Great Britain only managed one Olympic gold medal in Atlanta, Ask Jeeves was let loose upon the internet and Danny Boyle released his follow up to Shallow Grave. Trainspotting was unleashed into the world at a time when Britain and Brit Pop were at riding a wave of popularity. England’s football team looked impressive, although normal service has most definitely been resumed. Cool Britania was a word that even politicians could get away with using and no one had even heard of Simon Cowell yet. Based on the novel by Irvin Welsh, Trainspotting was a visceral gut punch that did not care who it offended or how it did it. An emotional rollercoaster that not only left its mark in society but helped make household names out of some the stars. What also helped sear this film into the collective memories of those who saw it and society was the soundtrack that accompanied it. Iggy Pop’s Lust For Life is used in what has become an iconic opening scene to the film and this is only really bettered by the use of Underworlds Born Slippy, SHOUTING LARGER, LARGER, LARGER…

Trainspotting 2 is set twenty years on from that iconic pillar of cinema and it returns with the original cast, location and the original director. For those of you keeping score you’ll remember that the first film finishes with Mark, Ewan McGregor, heading off into the sunset after having ripped off his friends, Simon aka Sick Boy and Begbie, played by Johnny Lee Miller and Robert Carlyle respectively and relieving them each of four thousand pounds. Money they had earned from a particularly successful drug deal. The only friend he doesn’t betray is Spud, played superbly by Ewan Bremner. Partly because he feels sorry for him but mostly because Spud wakes up just as Mark is leaving. It’s safe to say that Simon and Begbie are none too pleased to discover that their friend has decided to relieve them of the burden of spending all of that money and as with so many modern day fairy tales, they all (well most) lived unhappily ever after.

Well that’s what you’d have been expected to believe but wouldn’t you know it, they decided to revisit the world of drugs, drink and depravity in the form of a sure to be money making sequel. Never again would anyone have to wonder, whilst sat around the table at the local end of the world pub or during friendly discourse at the ‘aren’t we great’ dinner parties held by those in the know, what that cheeky little scamp, Mark, did with his twelve thousand pounds. Did he decide to choose life, a career, a fucking big television or low cholesterol? Or for that matter a starter home, leisurewear and matching luggage, a three piece-suite on hire purchase or DIY and wonder who the fuck he was on a Sunday morning? No, everyone will now be able to put rumour and conjecture to bed and sleep safe in the knowledge that these burning questions are well and truly done and dealt with.

T2 also starts with another running scene but this time no one is being chased or hunted down. This time a treadmill replaces the urban outdoors and although it’s still Mark doing the running, its calories leaving his body as opposed to chemicals entering that he’s concerned with. The problem Mark has, however, is not something that you can out run. The slow burning fuse of guilt is what is permeating through his soul and the realisation that he needs to return home to try and make amends. So, before you can say one way ticket from Amsterdam to Edinburgh, please, Mark finds himself at back in the land of tartan biscuits and shortbread kilts, ready to address his demons and more importantly his former friends.

This leads us into an extended ‘where are they now’ montage. Simon has diversified and now finds himself running a pub that’s has such a low number of regulars it might as well be called The Hermit Arms. He also has a nice little side-line in blackmail, which basically involves a concealed video camera, an eastern European woman that he effectively pays to be his girlfriend, a hotel room and unsuspecting victims being filmed doing things that their respective partners and employers would not be overly pleased about. Spud is basically still Spud. He now has an estranged family and a son who he cares about deeply but the fact that he’s been unable to get or stay clean over the past two decades means his life is always about two steps past implosion and about three feet under the water line. Begbie, funnily enough, is in prison. Which given is rage and violence issues that were more than prevalent in the first film, will not come as a surprise to most. But fear not, just like those good old boys, The A-Team, he promptly escapes from a maximum security prison, whilst being treated in a not so maximum security hospital. Mark has to deal with these three throughout the course of the film and even though he is ultimately seeking forgiveness, the trails he has to go through to get it are hard work and testing.

Trainspotting 2 is a good film but it’s nowhere near as hard hitting as it predecessor. Although there are some scenes that are hard to watch, including an attempted suicide that gets very messy, it does feel like a sanitised version of what it could have been. Instead of turning it up to 11 again, it’s almost as if Danny Boyle decided that 7 would be a far more acceptable volume level, because you know, you wouldn’t want to upset the neighbours or wake up the sleeping baby in the flat upstairs. The first film grabs you by the scruff of the neck and says ‘whether you want to or not, you’re coming on this journey with us and you better bloody enjoy it’, whereas this sequel just feels like it’s safe and comforting. If it were a piece of clothing it would be a well-worn cardigan with leather elbow patches. Something got lost along the way and I don’t know if it’s supposed to be because everyone is now older and allegedly wiser but the chaos and delirium that was ever present twenty years ago, seems to be on Prozac. Don’t get me wrong, I do like this film and would happily watch it again but it does have some awfully large shoes to fill and to be honest, by comparison it’s just not in the same league as its precursor.

I’ll finish off with a few little niggles that bugged me. Firstly, Begbie is in essence written and indeed acted as though he is a human cartoon character. Everything is over the top when it comes to his interactions and behaviour. Secondly, the soundtrack is a little too respectful of what has become before it and just reuses some on the same tracks but tries to be clever with it by remixing them. Lastly, the updated ‘Choose Life’ speech and how it’s delivered just seemed like it was just put in there as a clever little exercise in viral marketing and merchandise sales. All in all I’d say it was a solid three out of five stars. Sometimes sequels work and often improve on what has come before. All this sequel did was remind me that although we all probably wanted a second movie, we probably all didn’t want this one…

Twitter Review:
Mark, Spud, Simon & Begbie. Been there, seen that, bought the t-shirt.
#ChooseLife

Useful Links:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2763304/?ref_=nv_sr_2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EsozpEE543w
http://www.empireonline.com/movies/t2-trainspotting/review/

Lion



 



Hello dear reader. Pull up a chair, park bench or beanbag and make yourself comfortable. What follows is my review of Lion and its ever so slightly sombre overtones. Now, I should say that prior to its release Lion had really done much to win me over. I knew of its existence and if someone had pointed a gun at my head I would have been able to tell you which actors were in it. At least when it came to the main leads but in all honesty its subject matter didn’t really interest me at all. I can’t give you any specific reasons why either. I like India, I like Australians (to a point) and I’m a big fan of films that insert ‘based on a true story’ in their opening credits. All I do know that when it came to Lion both of my feet were firmly planted under the table on the apathy train and were not for moving. I am happy to report that I did go to see it and I can say without fear of contradiction or reprisals that I did actually enjoy it, much to my surprise.

So what is Lion about? Well, it’s a tale of a young Indian boy who, through a series of poor choices and bad luck, finds himself lost on the streets of Calcutta and a long way from home. He is then adopted by an Australian family and its then as an adult we watch him try and discover who he is, where he’s from, how he can find his Indian family and how he can reclaim his Indian heritage.

At the start of the film we are introduced to a small boy called Saroo. At no more than five or six years old he’s already helping his older brother Guddu to try and bring some money into help his single mother. Saroo manages to convince Guddu to let him come out with him one evening. Unfortunately the brothers have to separate and although Guddu tells Saroo to stay where he wakes up later, at the train station where he left Guddu, alone and with no sign of his brother.  Afraid and feeling isolated Saroo goes searching for his brother but after a vain exploration of the surrounding area he ends up on an empty train, exhausted and needing to rest. When he wakes again he finds himself locked inside the train, which is now moving and heading for destinations unknown. And that’s how simply Saroo’s life changes. In the space of twenty four hours he’s travelled over a thousand miles and not only is he unsure of where he is, Saroo, being very young and without the security blanket of his mother & brother, isn’t sure of the name of the village that he lives in either.

Lion is split into two parts. The first third of the film centres on the young Saroo, played, despite his young age, with maturity and precision by Sunny Pawar. It’s not an easy third to watch at times, especially knowing that is based on what actually happened to him as a young boy and what he had to do to survive. Saroo, despite the fact that he’s still in the same country he was born in, in effectively a stranger in a strange land. Not speaking the same language and not having his support network or anyone looking out for him, are just some of the things that just barely scratch the surface of what he has to deal with. The only thing that is a constant and that he can rely on, knowing that it will never change, is that life is hard and will not do him any favours. After some close calls and run ins with some less than commendable people Saroo finds himself in an orphanage and being looked after some staff that don’t really have his and the other children’s best interests at heart. However, it’s whilst at this orphanage that he is picked for adoption by an Australian couple, Sue and John Brierley, played by Nicole Kidman and David Wenham respectively. The last two thirds of the film deal with Saroo, now played by Dev Patel, coming to terms with his new life in a new country and his struggle to reconnect with his past. Knowing he has a brother and mother in India and that somewhere within the confines of its borders is the village he grew up in is what basically drives Lion forward. The feeling of wanting to belong and feeling accepted by a culture and a way of life that seems to be ever so slowly slipping away from him, one day at a time.

As I said at the start, Lion wasn’t really a film that I wanted to see and I suspect it will be the same for others too. Its subject matter by definition means that you know there are going to be things you watch that will upset you and Lion isn’t a story that’s been given the Hollywood ‘happy ending’ treatment. There are spoilers I could get into here but I won’t as knowing what you’re about to watch would lessen the emotional impact and water down the journey that Saroo goes on.

Overall Lion is a film that you will remember for a long time. Dev Patel once again proves that he deserves to be a leading man and can carry the emotional weight of this story, squarely on his shoulders and it can be only a matter of time before he is considered a member of the A-List crowd, when it comes to actors. I am reliably informed that the Australian accent Dev uses through the film is pretty near close to perfect and is at times better than Nicole Kidman’s. Lion at its core is a story about loss and understanding how you fit in with the world. A story about being driven almost to the point of self-destruction in an attempt to work out who you are and why you are and the sacrifices you have to make in order to find inner peace. Lion isn’t all sunshine and rainbows but at the same time it isn’t a film about pity and how hard life can be at times. Ultimately Lion is a story about a journey, both physically and mentally and it’s about wanting to belong. It’s not a perfect film, it does have its flaws but I think that’s the point. Art imitating life shouldn’t be faultless and regardless of the journey you go on, it’s where you call home that counts…

Twiiter Review:
Life is may well be a journey but you need to know where home is.
#LostAndFound

 

Useful Links:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3741834/?ref_=nv_sr_1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RNI9o06vqo
http://www.empireonline.com/movies/lion/review/

La La Land

Hello dear reader. So 2017 continues to roll along and with it the Hollywood production line continues to offer forth some exceptionally good movies. So far January has given us Manchester by the Sea, and every review I’ve read about has given it at least four stars. We’ve also had Martin Scorsese pop along and release his ’20 years in the making’ Silence. A film that, by all accounts, may earn him a couple of golden statues at the end of February. Now, I’ve had a reasonably busy 2017 so far and I’ve not had much down time to indulge the cinema junkie in me. So instead of going to take in the two previously mentioned celluloid treats, I ended up not taking the money or going for the box but in fact coming up with a third option which for the want of a better description I shall now refer to as ‘Jazz hands with feeling…’ That’s right, I went and watched a musical and I’m happy to report that I’m glad I did. Musicals haven’t had much in the way of attention recently and since their golden age of the forties, fifties and sixties, they’ve struggled to attract the Hollywood dollar and apart from the occasional little exception like Moulin Rouge, Chicago and Les Miserables they haven’t really been the most popular of movie genres to make. The other small issue here is that I’ve never been overly keen on the whole music, dance routines, smiley face, happily ever after movie concept that is musicals. My favourite of the bunch being Fiddler on the Roof. Which for those of you who haven’t seen it is about as far removed from happily ever after as it’s possible to get. So it came as nice surprise when I found out that Damien Chazelle would be following up his directorial debut Whiplash with a Musical set in LA and staring Emma Stone & Ryan Gosling. Surprise was then pushed to its very limits when I watched the first trailer for it and actually found myself thinking that I wanted to go and see it. So ladies and gentlemen, without further ado I present to you the reason you’ve read this far and offer up my humble opinion on what La La Land is all about…

Firstly, it should be stated that although La La Land is a musical, it only just about qualifies as one by the skin of its teeth. Yes, it has dance numbers in it and yes it has music running throughout its two hour run time but I think I counted only six (possibly seven) songs that were actually sung during the entire film and one of those was an actual song sung to a paying audience at a music gig. That said, the songs in question are very good and when put together with ye olde dance routines they do jump out at you and grab your attention. This is especially true on the films big opening number. A single tracking shot that last for a good 10 minutes or so. Set on a freeway overpass (and I’m not even going to start think about the traffic chaos that caused when they shut it down to shoot there) we meet our two stars Mia and Sebastian, Stone and Gosling respectively, caught in a traffic jam while the rest of the occupants of the stationary vehicles, jump, dance and sing around them. This sets the tone for the rest of the film and helps the cinema goer acclimatise to the next one hundred and twenty minutes of entertainment. 

As plots go it’s a relatively simple affair. Wannabee actress has come to make it big in Hollywood and is waitressing to pay the bills while Jazz lover and talented piano player want’s to share his passion for music with the rest of the world and open his own club. Told over the course of year, we see their trials and tribulations and their relationship ups and downs. Along the way we bump into a talented bunch of actors who play bit parts and play them well. Skipping across the screen their best foot forward and hitting those key changes as if their lives depending on it. JK Simmons turns up again but instead of screaming ‘not my tempo!’ as he did in Whiplash he has a small cameo as a restaurant owner who likes his music his way and most definitely on his terms. The other notable performance comes from John Legend, who has quite the pedigree behind him when it comes to singing but not so much in the acting department. Thankfully he doesn’t get asked to do any heavy lifting in regards to the story and his voice more than makes up for any shortfall in his acting ability.  

I’m also happy to state for the record that La La Lands two main leads can actually hold a note too, although one of them has a far better grip when it comes to the holding. Gosling has about the same level of talent as Russel Crowe when it comes to the doh ray me’s. Which isn’t to say it’s bad at all but his report card should read ‘could do better’. Damien Chazelle has now made two films in a row that are not only music based but are also one part jazz and two parts human relationships. Now they are both at completely different ends of the music film spectrum and both very good but I’m not sure the world needs another film to complete his jazz trilogy. He’s obviously an incredibly talented writer and I don’t think that Chazelle’s directing skills can currently be called into question. La La Land is not only acoustically appealing it is also visually elegant. It has a feel and atmosphere about it that makes it look like it was all shot through pastel tissue paper. If I have a criticism about La La Land it comes with the climax of the movie. I won’t spoil anything for you but I will say it left me very much thinking along the lines of ‘oh’. I would recommend going to see it. It will entertain you easily and unquestionably make you smile at times. I wouldn’t go so far as to say that this is a feel good movie but it will make you forget about the outside world when you watch it. I hope whatever Chazelle tackles next is a complete departure from his previous two efforts. He seems to be good a character driven stories and I suspect given the opportunity he could really shine with his next undertaking. It just needs to dial down the musical overtones and keep the great music purely as a soundtrack dividend. That said, I’d probably go and see a jazz western or maybe even a musical science fiction film and I wouldn’t be at all surprised if the major Hollywood studios are presently falling over themselves to let him make whatever he damn well wants. 

Twitter Review: 

Two shots of happy, one shot of sad. Singing and dancing that isn’t half bad.

#LoLoLovely

Useful Links:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3783958/?ref_=nv_sr_1

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pdqf4P9MB8

http://www.empireonline.com/movies/la-la-land/review/

2016: My Year in Review (plus a couple of films i haven't blogged about)

 

Hello dear reader, well it’s time to play catch up on 2016. Below you’ll find my top five films of the year and also five films that I managed to miss. I’ll also be taking the time to tell you about two films I saw towards the end of the year and didn’t have time to blog about, including the excuses why I didn't as well.

 

The first film I failed to tell the world about was Arrival. This was one of those odd films that crept up on me and that I didn’t know much about until about two months before its release date. However, once I had heard of it, it seemed to be everywhere. Directed by Denis Villeneuve, who was responsible for 2015’s Sicario and who has been given the big chair for this year’s Blade Runner sequel, it tells the tale of a potentially non-hostile alien race that ‘arrive’ on earth. Their arrival comes in the form of twelve spaceships that take up positions over various locations all over the globe and then just hover there, exactly that same way that cars don’t. The U.S. government decides that communication, not conflict is the way forward and hires the best Linguistics Professor they can get their hands on. Louise Banks, played by Amy Adams, is the Professor in question and with the help of a Theoretical Physicist Ian Donnelly, played by Jeremy Renner, they set about trying to make sure things don’t deteriorate with other governments and the ships that they are dealing with. Throw in a military operation run by Forest Whitaker, a few flash backs and some wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff and that’s basically Arrival in a nut shell. I can’t really get into the story any further without getting heavily into spoiler territory but I would say that it’s a film that’s worth watching.

Arrival is an odd film. A lot of reviews I’ve read for it have tagged it with the ‘thinking man’s’ Sci-Fi film label. That’s a little unfair to be honest. It certainly isn’t a film that is full of flashy special effects and alien’s hell bent on world domination, like Independence Day for example. It is however a film that is character and story driven. It doesn’t waste money on frivolous things like an extensive colour pallet or creating huge sound stages that get used only once. Instead it uses rolling fields and oceans as its back drop and is also a film that doesn’t seem to be in any rush to tell its story. It will almost certainly garner Amy Adams an Oscar nod although from what I’ve read she’s ultimately likely to lose out to Natalie Portman for Jackie. To sum Arrival up I’d say that you will never have watched a Sci-fi film like it before and it will stimulate the little grey cells when you watch it. It’s also one of those rare films that almost certainly won’t get a sequel, not because it didn’t make enough money but simply because it’s a completely self-contained story. Make time to see it. You’ll be glad you did.

The second film on my tardy correspondence list is Fantastic Profits and Where to Find Them, or something like along those lines. For those of you how don’t know or for that matter don’t care. This is a film that is set in the same universe as the previous forty seven Harry Potter films. Now, I should say for the record that it may look like, given that preceding introduction, I’m not the biggest fan of J.K. Rowling and all things Voldemort, Muggle and Magic. This could not be further from the truth. I own all of the forty seven previous aforementioned films on Blu ray and not one of them is currently doubling as a coaster. My problem with these films although I consider them to be good, I just don’t see them as great. Yes I know I’m not really the demographic they’re aimed at and there’s as much chance as me jumping on the HP merchandising bandwagon as there is me being used a Vidal Sassoon model but as films judged on their own merits, they’re all three or four star films at best.
Fantastic Beasts follows the main character Newt (not the one from Aliens) Scamander and his trip to New York. Armed only with his trusted wand and with a suitcase that could quite easily give the Tardis a run for its money in the ‘open plan’ stakes, Newt finds himself very quickly embroiled in the local wizard vs No-Majs secrecy battles and before you can say “I hope nothing escapes from that case of his” lots of things, well three to be exact, have escaped and disappeared faster than a rat up an aqueduct. The film then follows Newt’s attempts to recapture these beasts and not let the general public in on the fact that there are is also some fairly dark and evil magic roaming around the Manhattan. As per usual with these films they have a great cast. To start we have Oscar winner Eddie Redmayne as the aforementioned Newt. Add to this Colin Farrell, Jon Voight, Samantha Morton, Ron Pearlman, an almost unrecognisable Ezra Miller and Johnny Depp (although I wouldn’t be at all surprised if his part is recast for the next film and other sequels that have already been green lit) and you have the makings of a great ensemble cast. My main problem with this film is its running time. Two hours and thirteen minutes isn’t exactly what you call a long film. That’s precisely the same time Rogue One had. However, Rogue one didn’t feel like twenty minutes could have been lifted out of its second act without it having any detrimental effect on its story or characters, Fantastic Beasts did. It is Rowling’s first foray into screenwriting and you’d expect her to be able to write these characters better than anyone else available, given that she created them in the first place but it did feel at times as though something was missing. Redmayne seems to spend the majority of the movie trying to do his best Hugh Grant ‘bumbling but loveable’ impression that Mr Grant had down pat for most of the previous twenty years and Colin Farrell just seems to be acting by numbers during certain parts. For those of you who are interested in this film universe I suspect you will have already parted with your hard earnt pennies and taken yourself off to your nearest multiplex to watch this film. I for one would have probably waited for the dvd release but I think seeing it on the big screen was probably a good thing. The third act is crammed with more special effects than you’d find at an Industrial Light & Magic convention and although the film wasn’t scored by John Williams, James Newton Howard had baton duties this time, it certainly filled the room I was sat in without any problems at all.

 

So, now we’ve played catch up, I can get down the best films I’ve seen this year. I thought long and hard about this, placed ads stating that I’d be willing to take bribes to include certain titles and even considered just pulling names out of a hat but In the long run I decided that honesty was the best policy and so, without further ado, I present to you my top five movies of 2016 that I thought were bestest.

 

1: Spotlight
2: Victoria
3: Arrival
4: The Big Short
5: Captain America: Civil War

 

Civil War was one of those films that shouldn’t have worked. Far too many characters to keep interesting and way to much visually to fit in, even with a running time of about two and a half hours. However not only does work, it showed that Marvel were and are leaps and bounds ahead of what DC are trying to do. If you’ve seen Batman v Superman or Suicide Squad, you’ll understand precisely what I mean. The reboot of Spider-man not only worked but pretty much stole the show and the script was sharper than a sharp thing, on national sharp day in sharp land.
The Big Short is a story about capitalism at its finest. If you can get past the fact that Christian Bale is playing the smartest person in the room, gets his hair styled at supercuts and has some pretty serious commitment issues when it comes to shoes, then you’ll probably enjoy this film. Based around the financial recession that hit back in 2008 and the subsequent collapse that followed. It tells the story of how, to quote Gordon Gekko “Greed works” and what lengths people will go to in order to make money, even when that comes at the detriment of others.
Next is Arrival and as I mentioned earlier it’s a Science Fiction film that doesn’t really like conforming to the genre it’s sitting in. It also proves that any passing aliens that do turn up on our door step should be just as scared of us as we are of them.
At number two we find Victoria, which I blogged about last year. In short it’s a two hour film about a Spanish woman who’s recently moved to Berlin. Now, that may not sound like a film you’d want to invest over one hundred and twenty minutes of your life in but when I tell you that the entire film is just one single shot and includes a night club, a bank robbery and a shootout with the police, you should change your mind. Seriously, go and watch it. It’s simple, it’s unique and it’s a piece of film making brilliance. This leads me to my film of the year.
Spotlight is a film that does something that shouldn’t really be possible. It takes a subject matter that shouldn’t be watchable, not only watchable but also compelling. The Boston Globes ‘Spotlight’ team look into allegations of child abuse in the Catholic Church. The further they look into these allegations the more apparent it becomes that there has been an extensive cover up, going back decades, in order to keep these accusations from ever seeing the light of day. Along with Keaton the cast also includes, Mark Ruffalo, Rachel McAdams, Live Schreiber, John Slattery and Stanley Tucci. If you’re not keen on plot driven stories and acting of the highest calibre then this film probably isn’t for you.  If you like your films to be a bit more ‘bang for your buck’ the closest this film comes to an action scene is when someone does some photocopying. Despite the very heavy tone and subject matter of Spotlight it’s a film that should be watched, it’s a film that should be praised and it’s a film that should be championed as much a humanly possible. It’s also worth noting that for the second year in a row Michael Keaton  has found himself playing a major part in the Best Picture Oscar winner, the first being Birdman. After several years in the wilderness it looks like Hollywood may have actually realised that Keaton can not only act but he can cat very well. Long may this revival continue…

 

Now, its excuses time. There were films that were released last year that for various reasons, namely lack of time, three week holidays to the other side of the planet and having a boat load of good TV to get through first (Game of Thrones, West World, Stranger Things, Home Under The Hammer etc) that I never got around to watching. There is of course no way I can put these in any particular order of preference but I have heard from people, whose opinion that I hold in very high regard, that some of these are simply brilliant. I do plan on rectifying the whole ‘not having seen them’ issue pronto quick but if you do have a spare evening and are at a loose end as to what to watch, may I put forth the following five films as genuine bona-fide recommendations. 
Firstly we have Hateful Eight, which is the second in a promised trilogy of westerns from Quentin Tarantino. The first of course being Django Unchained. I could speculate about the plot of Hateful Eight but having not seen it I’d just be shooting in the dark. I think I’m safe in saying it doesn’t have anything to do with the Fantastic 4 fighting their own evil clones in the middle of a Wyoming winter. I do know that as per usual, for a QT film, its cast is abounding with A-list talent. Kurt Russell, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Samuel L Jackson, Tim Roth and Bruce Dern, to name but a few.  It’s a shade over three hours long and has an eighteen certificate so I’d expect there to be quite a lot of the red stuff splattered around the screen and probably best avoided by the squeamish.
Next we have Hacksaw Ridge. Directed by Mel Gibson, which I’m sure will automatically make it a no-show for some people but if you can past the politics and religion issues then I am told that as war movies go it’s found itself nestling in quite a few well regarded critics all-time top ten in the film genre. Staring Andrew Garfield it tells the tale of U.S. army medic Desmond T Doss who served during the battle of Okinawa and refused to kill anyone. Thus becoming the first American soldier in history to win the medal of honour without firing a single shot.
Option three is Hunt for the Wilderpeople. This is a film that caught many by surprise and probably slipped past most people’s radars completely. Written and  Directed by Taika Waititi, who also took on both duties for What We Do in the Shadows, it’s a story about a rebellious kid and his foster uncle, who go missing in the New Zealand bush. These two characters, played by Julian Dennison and Sam Neil respectively have won over pretty much every reviewer that’s gone to see it and it has been repeatedly mentioned as the feel good movie of the year. It’s also worth noting that Waititi has been given the directorial reigns over Thor: Ragnarok, which is due to arrive in cinemas at the end of October. It seems like he’s building up quite the CV and it will be interesting to see what he takes on next.
Fourthly come Room. A story about a mother and son who are locked in a room. She creates a whole universe for him inside the confines of the four walled prison that they find themselves trapped in and is steadfast in her unwillingness to let that stop her from raising him to the best of her ability. They plan an escape and this brings them face-to-face with what may turn out to be the scariest thing yet: the real world. The mother is played by Brie Larson and it won her last year’s Oscar for best performance by an actress in a leading role. It also may have helped her land the part of Carol Danvers or Captain Marvel as she’s also known in the self-titled MCU film that’s due in 2019.
Lastly on my list of shame for not watching is Hell or High Water. Now I suspect I’d be right in saying that of the five films I’ve listed here, this is almost certainly going to be the one that most people will know little about or nothing about. Staring Chris Pine and Jeff Bridges, it’s a story about two brothers, one of which has just been released from prison and their struggles to raise enough money to save their ranch and pay off the mortgage attached to it. Their struggles come in the form of bank robberies and this brings them to the attention of Texas Ranger Marcus Hamilton (Bridges). On a quick side note, should you ever be offered a choice between hell or high water, always go for the high water. It has to be by far the more preferable choice. Unless of course your particular skillset doesn’t yet include floating. The more astute of you will have noticed that four out of five of those movies all start with the letter H. I can assure you that it’s all purely coincidental and that I didn’t spend all of 2016 being overtly hostile to anything that started with the letter H. I am not H’ist in any way at all.

 

So that concludes 2016 and my trips to the local picture house. I hope you enjoy these little written reviews and I also hope they entertain and occasionally raise the odd smile. I do try and keep these blogs light hearted and I don’t pretend to think that at the end of the day it’s anything other than my opinion. There will be more over the course of 2017 and I’m sure they will cover the good the bad and the indifferent. Thanks for your time and attention and as for my next blog. Keep watching the skies…

Rogue One

Hello dear reader, quite a while back and in a galaxy that is many many miles away (Note to self: that strap line has potential but needs work, come back to it later), there was a story about a bunch of trouble making space rebels and their plans to stop a ‘rather large’ space station thingy from destroying like everything and stuff. This story was called Star Wars and it ended up making quite a lot of money. So much so that the man behind it, a Mr George ‘Jar Jar’ Lucas decided that he’d like to make some more films. And so began one of the most popular and influential sagas in film history. Directors came, went and came back again, as did the ability to write anything resembling a good screenplay. Actors got older, waistlines fought the eternal good fight against costumes, CGI was added, tweaked and then added some more and then Disney came along and bought up the entire franchise for just over four billion dollars and change. Now, you don’t part with that sort of money and not expect a return on your investment unless your last name is Trump or you happen to be clinically insane, possibly both. So, shortly after the ink had dried on the Lucas Film contract Kathleen Kennedy announced that there would be a Star Wars episode VII, VIII & IV. After this and once the internet had been fixed there was also an announcement that there would be three standalone films, that would also be set in the Star Wars universe. The first of these being the back story about how the Death Star plans were ‘half-inched’ and then passed onto those pesky space rebels I alluded to earlier. So there you have it. Episode VII has been and gone and as sure as night follows day, for the foreseeable future at least, we will be having regular visits and lots of space, Jedi, lightsaber, kill the baddies, my spaceship is cooler than yours, live long a prosper malarkey all set a long time ago in a galaxy far far away….

(I knew I’d nail that strap line if I gave it enough time)

So where to start with Rogue One. Well to begin with I will say it’s a great film but it’s by no means perfect. It does have its problems, some of which I will bring up later but before I get into the whole who, what, why when and where shenanigans I should warn you that there is absolutely no way on this earth, or on Tatooine for that matter, that I can say what needs to be said without drifting heavily into spoiler territory. In fact, I would go so far as to say that not only is it deeply in spoiler territory, it’s in flared wheel arches, twin bore exhausts and blanket on the parcel shelf territory too. So I’m going to assume that if you’re reading this then you’ve already seen Rogue One and you are fully aware of what happens, who it happens to and why they had to pluck a chicken to do it. If you haven’t seen it yet consider yourself warned and enter at your own peril…

So the first ten to fifteen minutes of the film are spent ‘world building’. We the audience get shown a series of different planets, which have all been conveniently labeled with title cards in the bottom corner. Just think Google Maps but on a much bigger scale. We’re introduced to new people and different characters. New good guys and new bad guys. 

Whilst we are planet hoping we are introduced to Lyra and Galen Erso, played by Valene Kane and Mads Mikkelsen respectively. They are the parents of Jyn Erso, a young girl who eventually becomes the hero of our film and who sets her stall out quite firmly under the good guy banner. 

Galen is visited by the Empire, in the form of Director Krennic. Krennic, who is played by one of Australia’s best ‘rent a bad guy’ actors Ben Mendelsohn and basically insists that Galen jumps on board ‘Project: Killer Death Beach Ball’ and during the course of his complex and convoluted negotiations Lyra decides to stop living and Jyn dips her toes in the world of competitive hide and seek. Krennic then leaves with Galen and before you can say ‘secretly working for the bad guys but making sure that I put a HUGE design flaw into the plans I submit’ Galen is working for the bad guys etc etc. Now, one of the reasons I think Rogue One doesn’t have an opening crawl is because this is all basically shown as flashback. Well to be honest it’s all flashback, given that it's set a long time ago but this first section is more flashback than the rest. But because this film has a time jump in it, the start gives you all the back story you really need to be going on with and it probably doesn’t need one.  

When we do jump forward we see Jyn Erso played, very convincingly, by Felicity Jones. We find her stuck in prison for doing something we never get told about but I suspect is very naughty. As she is being transferred, along with other prisoners, a small rebel group attack and set her free and this then sets in motion a very long chain of events that ultimately lead Jyn back to her father and the recovery of the Death Star plans. 

So what do I like about Rogue one? Well to start with it actually feels like a good old fashioned Star Wars film. It is full of great characters including a fantastic droid voiced by Alan Tudyk and an interesting performance from Forrest Whitaker as Saw Gerrera, and if you don’t like that character name Limpy McLimperson or Breathy McBreatherson would also work just as well. Ben Mendelsohn is a great bad buy and without wishing to be too harsh makes Hayden Christensen performances look about as scary as a Jawa armed with ice cream. It’s obvious from the start that a lot of time and effort has gone into trying to make this as good as they could but this now leads me into the ‘don’t like’ portion of my blog. Some of you may see a few of these complaints as completely wrong or just plain old nit picking but they did detract from my enjoyment of watching Rogue One.  

So in no particular order here goes… 

There aren’t any swipe edits.

For an expanded universe all the planets seem to be remarkably close to each other. For example, when the X-Wing fighters are dispatched to take out the Imperial base that Galen and Krennic are on they take about thirty five seconds to arrive.

The Death Star targeting seems to be as erratic and inconsistent as your average Strom Trooper. They manage to wipe out a city on Jedha without any problem at all but when the weapon is fired at the end of the film to stop the plans being uploaded, it misses by about 10 miles. That said I do like the fact that the Death Star seems to have an Eco or Green weapon setting and can be fired at low power. 

Governor Tarkin doesn’t work. It isn’t far off from being convincing but the CGI still isn’t good enough for me. And as for the other computer generated character at the end, well that looked even less realistic, in my humble opinion. 

I miss the 20th Century fanfare at the start. 

No Star Wars fanfare at the start either.

Darth Vader seems to be wearing rose tinted sunglasses, every time he’s on screen. 

Everyone dies.

Rogue One is basically one third chase movie, one third war movie and two thirds bad maths. It’s a solid four star film and I know it comes already burdened with expectation but there is definite room for improvement. The Emperor is mentioned but doesn’t get any screen time. The score from Michael Giacchino is good but it didn’t leave any lasting impression on me and overall I just got the impression that they were trying too hard to keep everyone happy. This is a good start for the standalone series and next we have the Han Solo origin chronicle, arriving at some point 2018. If it’s as good as Rogue One I’ll be happy. As long as he shoots first of course…

Twitter Review:

Strong female lead, a great character ensemble & a very strong effort.

#DoOrDoNotThereIsNoTry 

Useful Links:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3748528/?ref_=nv_sr_2

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sC9abcLLQpI

http://www.empireonline.com/movies/rogue-one-star-wars-story/review/

Doctor Strange







Hello dear reader. So after a brief intermission of about two months, it’s time to write one of those blog thingys and tell you all about a film a watched, whilst in Australia. The being in Australia bit isn’t really that important to the review, but it is worth stating for the record that the film in question didn’t have any extra CGI kangaroos inserted in it. Nor did it have anyone wandering around in the background, wearing those charming hats with corks hanging from them. I’m very happy to report that the film seemed to be unaltered or molested in any way at all and the audience, for the most part, were a nice bunch of Bruce’s and Sheila’s who did not encroach on my viewing pleasure at all. As you can tell from the poster above, the film in question is Marvels Doctor Strange and for those of you who are keeping score, it’s the fourteenth film set in the MCU.

Doctor Sherlock, sorry Strange, is a bit of an odd character. Prior to him becoming a superhero he is a surgeon by trade who is the best in the world at what he does. Couple that with an ego the size of Saturn and an all-encompassing attitude that is two parts ‘superiority complex’, one part ‘money fixes everything’ and a little dash of ‘extrovert’, he does come across as a hard person to like at the start. Things take a bit of a literal left turn for Strange when he crashes his car on the way to an awards dinner, being thrown in his honour. His hands, which are his stock in trade, get broken to the point of almost complete destruction and to cut a long story short, Strange can no longer perform as a surgeon, due to his inability to hold anything, let alone a scalpel, without his hands shaking uncontrollably. This obviously doesn’t go down to well with Strange. His surgical ability was the cornerstone of his powerbase and his happiness. Desperate to be allowed back into the operating theatre, Strange exhausts every avenue, looking for his golden ticket and the means to become whole again. Just as he is about to give up he is told about a patient that had been crippled and then one day waked past the doctor who had been treating him. Strange tracks this patient down and before you can say ‘one way ticket to the Far East please’ he buys a one way ticket to the Far East.
What follows is a fun and visual impressive journey into redemption and realisation that he isn’t the centre of the universe. A journey of discovery that covers the mystic arts, a bit of psychedelia and some alternative dimensions thrown in for good measure. Now to go into the plot any further than that would spoil most of the movie itself. That said, it is, for the most part, an enjoyable watch. There are a few things I would have liked to have seen done differently. Namely, the car crash is a little bit too graphic for my tastes and I suspect it may not be overly popular with parents who take their children to see it either. There’s also problem with the third act. Again, without giving away too much regarding the plot, I will say that Marvel have just reverted to ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t try to fix it’ and have based the final showdown between Strange and the film’s big bad (more of that later) around a city in peril. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like the setup and execution is always exactly the same but since 2012 Avengers Assemble, there have only been three films in the MCU (Iron Man 3, Ant-Man & Captain America: Civil War) that haven’t had their finale based either in, around or above a majorly populated city. Funnily enough, the director of the next and last (if Hugh Jackman is to be believed) Wolverine film, James Mangold, has stated recently that, with regards to his film, now called Logan; ‘if you’re looking for a gravity defying, city block destroying, cgi fuckathon, this ain’t your movie’.

It is a testament to Kevin Feige and Marvel that their movies have, over the last eight years, garnered the reputation that they have. The fact that, for all intents and purposes, they are ‘just’ comic book movies and as such aren’t likely to win anyone an Oscar or any other notable awards for that matter. The scripts aren’t going to push back the boundaries of acting, nor are they likely to require much in the way of emotional range but that hasn’t stopped people like Benedict Cumberbatch, Tilda Swinton, Chiwetel Ejiofer and Rachel McAdams, who are all Oscar nominees, jumping on board this little celluloid special effects train. And if that wasn’t enough, you can also add Mads ‘Hannibal’ Mikklesen, Benjamin Bratt and Benedict Wong into the mix as well. However, the one acting quota where Doctor Strange does fall down and fall down spectacularly is giving its female characters something to do. Sure, Tilda Swinton plays an important part and helps anchor the movie but as far as I can remember she barely has any interaction with any other female roles, let alone talking to them and Rachel McAdams doesn’t fare much better either. Her character is at best treated like if someone had asked her if she fancied the idea of cameoing in a Marvel movie. I do have high hopes for Brie Larson in 2019’s Captain Marvel and that it won’t just be a token character /performance, stuck in the middle of a testosterone overdose, whilst a passing city succumbs to the ravages of wondering bad guy, but I guess only time will tell…

So I’ll finish off with a few other bits and pieces regarding Doctor Strange that I would like to bring to your attention. Firstly, Benedict Wong plays a character simply called Wong, which is probably just one of those unlucky coincidences but just seems very lazy screenwriting to me. Secondly, if they could actually make it I would happily go on the record and say that the cloak of levitation would be at the top of most people’s Christmas list. Thirdly, the visual effects are spectacular but I couldn’t help thinking that at times it looked like a carbon copy of Inception. Lastly the aforementioned bid bad of the movie is an interdimensional entity that is quite keen on the earth being part of his planet collection. This struck me as a bit odd that and again I’m going from memory here, so forgive me if I’ve got this wrong, but having watched Doctor Strange ‘Dormammu’ would seem to be a far more powerful foe than Thanos and has never even been mentioned, in any prior MCU conversation. Yes I know that the infinity gauntlet and the infinity stones are all heading our way and are expected to arrive in the summer of 2018, in the aptly titled Avengers: Infinity War but what’s the point of spending 8 years and several trips to the local multiplex, building up a baddie and then pull the rug out from under him, with only 18 months before he gets here, with an even more powerful and vengeful antagonist. Oh and spoiler alert, Dormammu survives in Doctor Strange so I have to assume that he we either be conveniently forgotten about, the next time the Avengers hit the big screen or possibly join forces with Mr T in the ultimate quest for Power, Prestige and Pokémon. Benedict Cumberbatch actually plays both Doctor Strange and Dormammu as well. Well I say plays, he had his face scanned and then digitally reproduced. The image was then tweaked, prodded and manipulated within an inch of its life and made to look like a an evil bobble head, who’s body is currently AWOL. Dormammu is also only on the screen for about five minutes. Prior to that the bad guy duties fall squarely on the shoulders of Mads Mikkelsen and this band of not so merry men/women. Which is fine but it left me feeling slightly cheated.

So in closing I’ll say this. 2016 has been a great year for the MCU and a solid improvement on 2015. It started with Captain America: Civil war, which I would have to put in the MCU’s top three best films. Then came Doctor Strange, which does have some problems but let’s be honest here, isn’t nearly as catastrophically bad as a certain ‘Son on Krypton vs Son of Gotham’ movie that I can’t bring myself to mention. Next year we get three, yes three, new members of the MCU to look forward to. Firstly, in April, we have Guardians of the Galaxy: Vol 2 and first impressions of that look great. Then next summer we have Spider-Man: Homecoming, in which we see Tom Holland getting his own movie, fresh from his scene stealing performance in Civil War. However, the film that I’m really looking forward to is Thor: Ragnarok. It’s directed by Taika Waititi and if you don’t know who that is shame on you! Due at the end of next October, it’s another film that seems to have assembled an amazing ensemble cast. Including, Cate Blanchet, Jeff Goldblum, Karl Urban and Sam Neil. Along with the usual suspects of Chris Hemsworth, Tom Hiddleston, Jamie Alexander, Mark Ruffalo, Anthony Hopkins and Idris Elba. Throw in a hammer for good measure and you’ve basically got the ingredients for a movie that will not only knock DC’s Justice League film out of the park. It will (hopefully) be the final nail in the coffin for Zack Snyder’s involvement in their cluttered and messy film franchise…

So go see Doctor Sherlock, sorry Strange. It’s funny, it’s flashy and it’s fashionably repetitive. Not quite a four star movie but it isn’t far off it.

Twitter Review:
2 Benedict’s, 1 Swinton, a Mads & some CGI. Doctor Strange entertains but he needs to work on his bedside manner.
#CloakSoldSeperately      

Useful Links:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1211837/?ref_=nv_sr_1
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSzx-zryEgM
http://www.empireonline.com/movies/doctor-strange/review/