Hello dear reader. Right, first things first, an apology of sorts. It’s been a while since my last blog. In fact, checking my back on my last film post, which was Wonder Woman, it’s been just over five months since I offered up an opinion on something I’d seen in a multiplex. There were and are reasons for this and some of you out there will be aware of what they were. I’m not going to elaborate on specifics but all I will say is that writing for me has never felt like something I was naturally good at and in order to do it any sort of justice I need to be in the right frame of mind all head squirrels need to be fully occupied. Preferably planning for a long and substantial hibernation or at the very least far too busy out looking for nuts, for them to be causing me any significant problems. There have of course been films that I’ve seen during this five-month hiatus. Baby Driver, Spider-Man: Homecoming and Blade Runner 2049, to name but three. I will come back to these in a couple, of week when I compile my year in review, which should hopefully be internet bound in the first weeks of January. So, as I alluded to earlier. I apologies for not being around much on the film opinions front recently but whether you like it or not, I’m back.
So, as you can tell from the poster above, I thought I’d start with something small and ease myself back into this whole blogging process with a piece about an under the radar independent science fiction film about a group of heroes and villains, who existed ‘quite a while back in a cosmos that was chuffing remote’ (catchy eh?). Star Wars: The Last Jedi or if you want it in metric, Episode VIII, is the latest instalment of a franchise that despite three efforts to the contrary, can do no wrong. As I’m sure you are all aware Episode IV started the ball rolling back in 1977 and being the age that I am I can say with some degree of pride that I have seen every single one of these merchandising extravaganzas on the silver screen, the year they were released. Which means by my calculations, I have spent 1082 minutes, or 1218 if you include Rogue One, getting what could at best be described as a numb bum whilst lining the pockets of a Mr G Lucas of San Francisco. Now that may not seem like a lot in the grand scheme of things and when you realise that there are 1440 minute in a day, it seems even less substantial. Having to set aside one twenty four hour period to watch, what is arguably the best film franchise in history doesn’t sound like too high a price to pay but it’s when you start to look at the small print that things start to get interesting. It gets complicated/alarming (delete where appropriate) when you add in repeat viewings. Even best guess estimates for how many times you’ve watched each film start putting the total accumulated minutes figure into the scary end of advanced mathematics. For example, I have no way of ever really knowing for sure but I’d be willing to bet all three of my kidneys that I must have seen the original Star Wars at least 75 times and I wouldn’t be at all surprised if someone told me that total was now into three figures. That means even with the low-end estimate that I’ve spent the better part of 6.3 days watching Leia, Luke, Han and the gang battle through and save the day, again and again and again. And of course, that 6.3 days is just one film. If you add in the other films and calculate a figure for the entire collective, things start to get really scary.
There’s a quote, that I’m sure most of you are aware of that goes along the lines of ‘Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results’. Is it insane to devote/spend (again, delete where appropriate) that much time watching one film and getting the same level of satisfaction out of it, as you did before? No, it isn’t and I’ll tell you why. Thanks to the aforementioned Mr G Lucas of San Francisco, you can watch it as often as you want and every now and then things change! A little line of dialogue here, a cgi tweak there and before you know it you’ve got a new special edition, repackaged, out and sitting on the shelf of your local dvd store faster than you can say ‘I love Jar Jar’. So why do we do it? Why do some of us invest so much time and energy into a franchise that doesn’t always deliver? The answer is complicated but basically I think it comes down to plot, characters and a liberal sprinkling of escapism. Just sitting there, whether it’s at home, the not so comfortable chairs with the accompanying ‘suspiciously’ sticky floors of your local multiplex or even tablets or mobile phones and just switching off or an hour or two and just relaxing with what are effectively old friends. It’s the celluloid safety blanket that so many people come back to and use as their comfort food. So, whether you’re a super fan, just someone who enjoys watching them or even someone that thinks they could happily live without them. If Disney have anything to do with it, the you’re going to be living under their shadow for the for quite some time…
So, lets gets to the meat and bones of why you’re here. My take on The Last Jedi and did it float my boat at all? As with previous films I’ve blogged about there is no real way for me to discuss what I liked and what I didn’t (more of that in a minute) without mentioning spoilers. So, if you haven’t watched the film yet, may I suggest that you pop down to your nearest cinema forthwith and set aside two and a half hours and behold the longest Star Wars film ever made. Actually, you’d better make that three hours as there’s almost certainly going to be averts and trailers, tacked on at the start. Once you’ve done that come back and continue reading, I’m more than happy to wait…
Right, I’m going to assume that if you’ve made it this far you’re going to be okay with me bringing up and conversing with you about all things Star and indeed Wars and more than happy to read about spoilers, you are. I take no responsibility for you being upset and quite frankly if you’re daft enough to base your decision about going to see The Last Jedi on this review, may I respectfully suggest you seek help very quickly.
Rian Johnson was given the task of following on from JJ Abrams The Force Awakens and the first thing he did was tear up the screenplay that was in place and write his own. Now, in the grand scheme of things, this could be seen as a little bit risky but Disney obviously didn’t have too many issues with it as it’s his version that made it to the silver screen. Johnson didn’t have the most extensive back catalogue before being handed the keys to the kingdom. His most critically acclaimed works being Brick, Looper and three episodes of Breaking Bad but I guess anyone that can manage to get a decent performance out of Bruce Wills these days, must be doing something right.
Apparently, even though this is officially the longest Star Wars film ever made, his first cut came in at just north of three hours long. I’m not sure what was cut to bring it down to the more palatable run time but the second act still seemed a little too long but at the same time I also think the film could have benefited from being longer. I left the cinema feeling ever so slightly frustrated at what I’d seen. It left far more unanswered questions than it resolved and I just felt that Johnson didn’t really seem that bothered about how all the threads of his story were going to be resolved, as and when JJ Abrams brings Episode IX to the screen. It is by far the funniest Star Wars film to date and there are some genuine laugh out loud moments contained within in it. The film starts with a full-on space battle which was one of the things lacking in its predecessor. We get introduced to new planets, locations and characters and there’s enough of an eclectic mix to hold our attention. I was curious to see how they were going to deal with the death of Carrie Fisher and Leia not being a part of Episode IX and at one point it becomes clear how they decided to deal that problem. Only for them to pull the rug out from under everyone and ‘bring her back in’. I have no idea how they plan to resolve this conundrum. My hope is that it Leia isn’t killed off within the first five minutes of the next film, with the able assistance of some cgi slight of hand and that’s what’s used as the character motivation, to drive the film forward to its conclusion but I’m not willing to put money on that.
I liked this film but I do think there’s a lot wrong with it. However, before I get to my dislikes, which I will simple list as a series of observations, I would like to state for the record that I am by no means a Star Wars expert or aficionado and I’ve only seen The Last Jedi once. I’m more than willing to concede that on repeat viewings some of my issues could well be resolved and that despite my love for the original trilogy there are people out there that have a far better understanding of all things force related and be able to clear up and answer some of the items listed below. I do have some knowledge on the subject and have always had a soft spot for the Vulcans and Hufflepuff but my comprehension of the Star Wars universe is not all knowing…
In no particular order,
Supreme Leader Snoke is in about four scenes in the film and then is killed off by the poster boy for ADHD. I just don’t get it here. No back story at all, as far as I can tell. We’re supposed to be emotionally invested in the new big bad of this particular trilogy and then he gets cut in half faster than a hipster ordering a fresh panini in Hackney. Snoke is so all-powerful and bad that in one of his four scenes he actually manages to stand up. Criminally under used and a complete waste of a character, in my humble opinion.
As is Captain Phasma. I can help but think that When Rian Johnson handed in his finished screenplay for The Last Jedi, someone from Disney took it away and read it and then had to go back and have a conversation with Johnson that must have included the phrases ‘Contractual Obligation’ & ‘Gwendoline Christie isn’t in here’. At which point he must have said something that may or may not have rhymed with pollocks and asked for twenty four hours to polish the script up. Captain Phasma appears towards the end of film and has about to as much to do as submarine captain in the Sahara.
This issue is to be filed in the ‘I don’t understand drawer’. Back to Snoke for a second. His flagship manages to track down the Rebel fleet using some tracking device that looks all very shiny and important and then launches an attack using what I can only describe at best as asthmatic weapons and firepower. These are the bad guys that have access to Death Star weaponry, which could, the last time I checked BLOW UP PLANETS but somehow the main Rebel ship, despite being in visual range the entire time, manages to stay just far enough out of range, for the weapons on Snokes flagship to be effective. There’s even a few lines of dialogue in the film where they speculate about the Rebels being low on fuel but do they speed up and do anything about it? Nope, not a mirror, signal, manoeuvre in sight.
This is also another entry in the ‘Huh?’ folder of wisdom. The Rebels make their escape in various transports, that apparently have cloaking technology. Firstly, why did no one seem it to be a prudent idea to fit the same tech to the main ship they were launched from? Secondly, these ships are only discovered when the First Order are told about them and their cloaking capabilities by Benico Del Toro’s ‘DJ’. My only problem with this is that they are clearly visible to the naked eye and as I mentioned previously, Snokes flagship wasn’t exactly a long way behind them.
So, as you’re all aware, Yoda turns up for a chin wag with ye olde Luke, just as he’s about to burn down a thousand year old Jedi tree temple thingy. When he first appears on screen he has the whole ‘I can see through you’ Jedi ghost thing under control but then in the very next scene he doesn’t. He just casually sits down next to Luke for a chat, looking thicker than a three week old bowl of rice pudding. No ghostly aura or ‘I can see what’s be behind you’ malarkey, nothing. I could be wrong but I’m sure there’s a ghost code of conduct that needs to be followed here and it can’t be that ILM simply ran out of money to complete the effect. I don’t know of any other Star Wars film were a dead Jedi has come back to impart wisdom, looking healthier than when they died in the first place!
While we’re on the subject of Luke. They make a big thing about him living in isolation. He doesn’t.
At the end of the film the good guys, whilst hiding out in the recently reacquired Rebel base, realise that Luke is buying them some time, to make their escape. Wouldn’t Luke actually telling them before he walks out to face Kylo and pals have been a far better use of everyone’s time and resources?
Poe Dameron, without wishing to be too critical, commits Mutiny. The punishment for this most serious of crimes? He gets smiled at.
I’ll finish off by saying this. Despite the niggles I’ve mentioned above this is a great film. It’s a great visual spectacle. There’s an emotional thread that runs through its two and a half hours and it does leave you wanting for more. It’s been twelve months since the world was given their last Star Wars fix and it’ll be another twenty four before Episode IX hits our screens. However, the next standalone film ‘Solo’ is scheduled to compete for your attention in next year’s Summer Blockbuster season. Until then you’ll just have to make do with the previous nine films but remember. A degree of self-control is required or you could find yourself sitting on your sofa at home with a thousand yard stare, wondering why you keep getting calls from your HR department, apparently…
Twitter Review:
The Last Jedi is a roller coaster of a ride. It has some emotional gut punches that leave you speechless & creates more questions than it answers. Episode IX will either be an exercise in great story telling or a complicated mess. Only time will tell
#JediDeadi
Useful Links:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2527336/?ref_=nv_sr_1
https://www.empireonline.com/movies/star-wars-last-jedi/review/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q0CbN8sfihY
